Marriage is just crazy... you spend all this time getting to know someone and then you start to live your lives together and then it's like you get to know them all over again! I feel like I learn something knew about Kyle everyday and I hope that never changes. I love seeing new sides of him, noticing things I never have before, and hearing new stories and thoughts.
However, what I have found to be one of the most challenging and encouraging aspects of adjusting to married life is that all my sin is no longer hiding and out of sight but completely exposed. In his book Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas explains this idea much better then I ever could.
"What marriage has done for me is hold up a mirror to my sin. It forces me to face myself honestly and consider my character flaws, selfishness, and anti-Christian attitudes, encouraging me to be sanctified and cleansed and to grow in godliness." -Gary Thomas, Sacred MarriageThat's something fairy tales never tell us about love and marriage!
One of these hard lessons came in an unexpected way recently... It was the 1,000,000th time I had ruined our dinner. I had burned, mutilated, destroyed, and completely butchered anything that had even come near the stove or oven. We hadn't eaten a decent meal since eating out on our honeymoon. As I pulled the charred chicken out of the oven I just kept saying "Oh no, oh no, oh noooooo, ohhhhhh nooooo!" I felt the tears beginning to well up and as Kyle came into the room I just burst into tears while Kyle burst into laughter! Then we both started just laughing hysterically at yet another failed attempt at cooking. He comforted me while we laughed and told me he wanted to go on a date that night anyways. So we headed out for some Thai food and ate until our heart's content :)
What I realized that night was that Kyle had shown me sooooo much grace in all my cooking disasters (and still does!). He realizes that this is so new to me. I have no idea how to be a wife and cook and clean and buy groceries. He knows this and offers me grace even when I burn the chicken for the millionth time. So the next time he makes the bed all wrong, puts things in the wrong place, or uses my Anthropology dish towel to actually dry the dishes I need to show him grace just as I have been shown from our Heavenly Father (and from my awesome husband). And when he falls short, I am still to show him grace. This is what marriage is all about! Mirroring our relationship with Christ. So that's my first lesson in marriage... A little grace goes a loooooooonggggg way!
Sincerely, The Amateur Housewife